In just a couple more weeks, I'll have been back in CT for 6 whole months. It feels like summer just began, and now we're entering the autumn zone in earnest.
I've been pretty busy. Going on a lot of evening walks. Gone swimming a bunch of times. Have eaten a ton of summer squash (that my mum & I grew from seed). Had some art up in a group art show in Hartford. Went to a summer carnival, saw fireworks a couple times. Spent time with family. Went to my fave local farmers market a few times. Ate some grilled food. And I got put on a big
project w/ my usual contract gig, so I've been working a ton, too. Honestly? This has been one of the most relaxing summers I've had in years. I've had my ups & downs, but it's been so good for me to be back here, back home. Even just the smell of the earth & air here has been restorative.
The thing about New England is, no matter what season it technically is, there's an underlying mood of Autumn mixed in. There's a certain haunted quality here year round. And I love it. Life still has a lot of challenges for me ahead, but at least I feel more at ease for awhile. This is a healing time.
I'm still around, despite things. Life has been difficult this past year, to say the least. I've dealt with a lot of loss and change over the past 12 months or so, and more ahead of me as the new year approaches.
To keep it brief: I'll be leaving this place and returning to the east coast. I've been yearning for that for some time now, but as with all major life changes, it comes with a whole range of complicated and intense mixed emotions: I've lost my primary income and my relationship. Things are rough financially. I've been spinning my own wheels for a year. And yet I have to figure out how to get myself moved 3k miles across the country. It's a lot.
So I've decided to take a piece of it with me in the form of permanent ink, where I can hold it close to my heart forever.
A couple of weeks ago, I got a tattoo of a particular bonsai that is very very special to me: the iconic Furuzawa Pine, a specific Japanese black pine (kuromatsu) tree found at the aforementioned Pacific Bonsai Museum.
Photo of the Furuzawa Pine that I took in Dec. 2023
The Furuzawa Pine has a fascinating history. It was grown in a tin can from seed by Japanese American Juzaburo Furuzawa in the early 1940s while he was incarcerated in an internment camp in Topaz, Utah, during World War II. He probably grew several trees, but this bonsai might be the only remaining one to survive to present day.
Despite all it had been through & all the places it traveled, the Furuzawa Pine continued to survive and thrive under expert care. Then in early 2020, it and another bonsai were stolen from the Pacific Bonsai Museum. Fortunately, they were returned a couple of days later and both trees made a full recovery.
I had seen the Furuzawa Pine plenty of times before at previous visits
to the PBM, but this news story really captivated me. Of all
the specimens there, it may not be the most showy or unique tree -
Japanese black pine are very common bonsai - but its history really
makes it special. Its particular species of tree is a symbol of
resilience, longevity, and strength: themes that resonate with me very
deeply, especially in the past few years. The Furuzawa Pine is very special to me now, and every time I see it in person it's like seeing an old friend.
Last night into today marks the Winter Solstice here in the Northern Hemisphere. I spent the early morning hours watching the live stream of sunrise at Newgrange in Ireland.
The Winter Solstice is an astronomical phenomenon that marks the shortest day and the longest night of the year. In the Northern Hemisphere, the Winter Solstice occurs on 21 or 22 December, when the sun shines directly over the tropic of Capricorn. At sunrise on the shortest day of the year, for 17 minutes, direct sunlight can enter the Newgrange monument, not through the doorway, but through the specially contrived small opening above the entrance known as the ‘roof box’, to illuminate the Chamber.
And then I left the house before dawn to try and get a glimpse of the
rising sun from my part of the world. Alas, too cloudy/rainy; nevertheless, I felt a sense of peace as the sky grew brighter.
In the next couple of months, I will be enduring a lot of things and going thru big life changes that will test my resilience. I'm not ashamed to admit that I'm pretty fucking scared. But I'm going to do my best to remember that the dark times don't last. The sun will rise again and bring back the light. I am resilient and strong. I can keep going. And I will find joy and peace and reasons to love living again.
One of my favorite seasonal rituals has been achieved - my annual visit to The Big E!
It was a gorgeous weekday, and we got there on the early side before things got too crowded. The sun was out, the temperature just right, a perfect autumn day from morning til evening.
The free wine tasting, featuring 6 New England area wineries, was one of the highlights of my late morning. It gets crowded during peak times and I hadn't been able to go in years. We didn't have to wait too long. I'm not even a big wine or alcoholic beverage person, but I do like new experiences and flavors, so this is always a fun time.
Of course, one of the main attractions to the fair is the food. This year I broke with tradition and mostly tried foods that were new: either new to me, or new to the fair this year, starting with plantain fries topped with pork, grilled onion/peppers, and a yummy sauce. Loved this and would get it again.
Next up: the apple fries, new to the fair this year and highly recommended. These were fantastic, crispy fries made of apples and dusted with cinnamon sugar - we opted for the caramel sauce addition.
New to me this year was the deep-fried taco, the outer skin reminded me a bit of an egg roll. We chose the chicken option, which also had lettuce, tomato, cheese, & sour cream. I would've loved some hot sauce on this, but it was otherwise pretty great.
We also shared a Mass Sea Breeze, a refreshing and very sweet drink.
And last up: the smoked salmon on a stick from the Maine building - which usually sells out as it is extremely popular. It's definitely some of the BEST salmon I've ever eaten, and I am a huge fan of salmon. I've had it before, but most years they run out before I can get it.
Pickle lemonade was one of the new offerings at the fair this year, but we didn't try it. There were a lot of pickle-flavored items, including pickle-topped pizza and a pickle cupcake. I didn't try any of those either. I like pickles, but not sure I need a pickle cupcake. Maybe if I'd had more wine it would've sounded like a good idea.
Last food item of the day, which is my usual custom, is buying a cream puff or 2 to bring home. This year's special flavor was MAPLE which I am extremely excited about. Maple is one of my favorite New England flavors, 10/10 would recommend this cream puff.
I was happy to see some Halloweeny vibes here and there as well, mostly in the Storrowtown/craft area of the fair.
The Rhode Island building always showcases the Great Jack O'Lantern Spectacular, which returns every year to the Roger Williams Park Zoo (and is absolutely worth visiting; I blogged about it a couple years ago)
Our night concluded with a spooky moonrise. And that's it for my 2023 Big E adventure!
To read more of my more in-depth posts about The Big E, check out these links:
Last night, Seattle - Bauhaus in concert at the majestic, opulent Paramount Theater in downtown Seattle.
Soriah was the opening act. We missed most of their set because we were in the merch line for quite awhile, but what we witnessed was incredibly powerful, setting the vibe for the rest of the evening.
The Paramount is one of the most ornate venues I've ever seen. Perfect setting. The scent of clove cigarettes, patchouli, weed, and booze hung in the hazy air. Literally perfect.
Then
the house lights went down and the stage lights flashed on. Strobe
lights and fog machine. Then the music began and it felt like a sacred
ritual had begun. The gods were summoned.
SET LIST:
Rosegarden Funeral of Sores (John Cale cover)
Double Dare
In the Flat Field
A God in an Alcove
In Fear of Fear
Spy in the Cab
She's in Parties
Kick in the Eye
Bela Lugosi's Dead
Silent Hedges
The Passion of Lovers
Stigmata Martyr
Dark Entries
Encore:
Sister Midnight (Iggy Pop cover)
Telegram Sam (T. Rex cover)
Ziggy Stardust (David Bowie cover) (!!!!)
Bonus content: Beautiful details throughout this golden palace. It was a evening of wonder. Total experience.
View from the merch line - which went all the way up to the second floor and wrapped around. Worth it.
